Planning a day to celebrate love with family and friends is exciting — especially for those who were denied the right for so long.
One of the challenges many same-sex couples face when planning a wedding is trying to shape heteronormative traditions to fit their day. Floral decor is one of those traditions.
Here are some tips for choosing unique yet matching floral arrangements for a same-sex wedding.
Consider Your Favorites
Before you start shopping for customized wedding flower bouquets online, determine which types of flowers you’d like to have. If you and your partner enjoy flowers and have favorites, consider making them the focal point of your matching arrangements. You can create arrangements that feature a sampling of each of your favorite blooms or make your individual favorites the centerpiece of your piece.
If you love roses and your partner loves lilies, you could each carry your favorite flowers in the same style bouquet and color palette. For a unique twist, have the florist include one of your partner’s preferred blooms in your bouquet.
For those who aren’t flower enthusiasts, look for inspiration from online flower shops and Pinterest mood boards. Look for images that speak to you, then take the time to learn what types of blooms are in the arrangements so you can communicate with your florist.
Consider Your Theme
Some couples like to start with the flowers; others like to start with the theme.
If you have a theme in mind, do some research to see which blooms suit the mood and tone. For example, if you look at moody florals, you’ll find an abundance of bouquets with burgundy anemones, chocolate cosmos, and eucalyptus accents.
Neutral-inspired arrangements tend to be heavy in antique pink carnations, bleached Ruscus, and pampas grass.
Consider the emotion and style you hope to convey with your decor. Think outside the theme and how you’ll capture your personal styles on your big day.
Look at Seasonal Blooms
While creating unique, custom bouquets is a gorgeous way to highlight your special day, it can be cost-prohibitive. Choosing flowers that are out of season tends to cost more and have a negative environmental impact. If it fits your budget, go for it! Otherwise, it’s best to shop in season.
Start by researching your favorite blooms and determining whether they’re in season in your area. If they aren’t, look at some similar alternatives. A skilled florist can also help you create a seasonal bouquet that still captures your style.
If you’re set on out-of-season blooms but have a limited budget, consider micro bouquets. This hot floral trend takes a minimalist approach to the traditional bridal bouquet and can feel more approachable for same-sex couples. Choose a small arrangement featuring one of your favorite blooms with some lovely accent greenery and florals. Micro bouquets are also an innovative way to elevate boutonnieres without being overstated.
Think About Symbolism
Adding a touch of symbolism to your wedding flowers can add depth and richness to your decor. Of course, your heterosexual guests may expect some rainbow arrangements. If you wish to include pride-inspired blooms, you certainly should. However, there are other meaningful blooms that hold symbolism in the LTBTQ+ community.
Green carnations have been symbolic in the gay community since Oscar Wilde popularized them in the late 1800s. Wilde used a green carnation pinned to the lapel to safely symbolize homosexuality to others in the community. As Wilde was persecuted and jailed for his attraction to men, this symbol is a beautiful way to highlight progress and pay homage to the literary great.
Lavender and violets are both rich in LGBTQ+ symbolism. The lore surrounding violets dates back to ancient Greece. The great poet Sappho wrote lyrical poetry devoted to the Goddess Aphrodite which featured violets as symbolism for her desire. When the poem was translated by historians, they rephrased it with masculine pronouns. The poem (and the violets) have since been reclaimed by the lesbian community.
Similarly, lavender became symbolic for lesbian women during the women’s rights movement and is still representative of intersectionality.
Choosing blooms for their symbolism is a powerful way to add dimension and meaning to your decor. Green carnation boutonnieres or violet flower crowns are a unique, stunning way to match your partner.
Choose Bouquet Styles
In heterosexual weddings, the bride typically carries a bouquet, and the groom sports a boutonniere. It’s entirely acceptable to throw this tradition out the window. If you and your partner have different preferences for your arrangement styles, explore them.
Carrying the same flowers in an alternatively shaped arrangement is a nice form of differentiation. For example, you could use the same blooms with one partner carrying a cascade bouquet and the other carrying a nosegay arrangement.
Rather than both brides carrying bouquets, one can carry an arrangement and the other can wear a boutonniere or a floral sash. Floral necklaces are another creative alternative to the sash or bouquet. Both can ditch the bouquets entirely and wear matching flower crowns with elements that better suit their identity and style.
The point is, rules are made to be broken. Grooms can carry bouquets if they want. Brides can wear boutonnieres. If someone wants to completely adorn themselves in flowers like Florence Pugh, why not?
Look at Other Floral Elements
The personal arrangements are just a small piece of the décor puzzle. In addition to evaluating how you’ll match one another, consider how your arrangements will fit the rest of the décor.
Planning your wedding at a naturally beautiful venue like a garden or conservatory is an excellent way to cut back on floral decor needs. Adding subtle elements that match both partners’ floral arrangements will also create cohesion if you have different tastes and preferences.
Create New Traditions
Take this opportunity to create new traditions and break the mold. Work with a skilled florist who can help capture your story as a couple and unique elements of your personalities in natural flower arrangements. This is your day to shine, together.
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Also, while we do our best to highlight LGBTQ-friendly destinations and businesses, info provided is based solely on personal experience and recommendations by community partners. We hope that nobody experiences discrimination or homophobia while visiting Florida, but we make no guarantees. Please inform us if you experience discrimination or homophobia while visiting any destination so we can make updates to our recommendations.